dan smith will teach you guitar/making flyers

i can't fucking believe it. holy mohammed mary moses. Throughout my entire life, i have seen "dan smith will teach you guitar" flyers posted on everything from walls to coffee shops, all the way from the upper west side down to the village. not only can he teach you guitar, but he will teach you how to be everywhere, at once...all the time. So imagine the pure ecstatic, orgasmic delight i felt when yesterday, i actually saw him putting up a dozen of his flyers in Murrays bagels on 13th and 6th ave. Dan Smith, in the flesh. my world has been officially rocked

see above...

Frankly, I don't know whether to be happy or sad with what seems like the inception of my new life as a "blogger." For a long, long time, I viewed the vast mass of entities called "bloggers" with disdain; bloggers were people who didn't have real, actual friends with whom they could have meaningful or semi meaningful conversations. To some extent I still hold this scornful opinion of "bloggers," though this is tainted by the fear of the unknown and the reluctance to do whatever it is that most young people are supposedly doing (like twitter, ironic sideburns, trendy folk psychedelic rock, etc.). A neighbor of mine, when asked what he did for a living, told me that he wrote a blog and, "had a bunch of people reading it." Ever mindful of tact, I had to resist the urge to say, "you can actually pay your rent? Really? Are you sure you don't sell reefer on the side?" Even my father has a blog, which definitely makes me not want to have one. However; in the spirit of honesty, I must examine my own wanna-be-trendy behavior and aspirations to see just how legitimate are my claims of not conforming to things that typical non conformists typically conform to. Firstly, I live in Williamsburg, crowned the hipster capital of the world. This does not help my case. It seems like a large proportion of the world's bloggers live here. Hmm, what else is another measuring stick of my blatant trendy-ness? Well...i've been known to wear vintage t-shirts. A quick look at my recently played folder in my i-tunes reveals that i've been listening to: Gangstarr, Radiohead, Elvis Costello, obscure soul singers from the late 60's and 70's, Ray Charles, obscure funk from the early 80's, and obscure rap artists from the 90's (note: Black moon, Smif-n-wesson, and pete rock are obscure only to most white people). This does not bode well for my supposed anti hipster ideology. Fuck, how tight are my jeans? whew. I almost lost it for a moment there. Despite everything I have mentioned above, the fact that my bollocks isn't squeezed in an iron, vice like grip by skinny jeans gives me the intellectual and spiritual leeway i need to blog. While we're on the subject, Iron Bollocks would be a good name for a band...or not.