Portrait 5 stephen(s)

 PORTRAIT OF THE PUNDIT AS A YOUNG MAN

They probably don't usually laugh this much at Park Avenue auctions. But then, how often do you have Stephen Colbert begging people to buy one of paintings?
 Our favorite "pundit" took satire to new levels the other night at Phillips de Pury & Company. He was on hand to auction off a portrait of himself. The $26,000 that he finagled out of the buyer will go to DonorChoose.org, an online group that raises money for classroom projects in needy schools.
The March 8^th contemporary art auction at de Pury featured "Portrait 5, Stephen(s)" among the 287 items sold that night. This painting had been featured on the Dec. 8th episode of “The Colbert Report.” During the show, artists Shepard Fairey and Andres Serrano had spray-painted the work and drawn on it with a Sharpie marker. (Note art lovers: The result didn't quite have the instant appeal of Fairey's famed Obama campaign poster.
"Portrait" had been on display since Feb. 25^th at de Pury’s West 15^th Street location. The actual auction was held at 450 Park Ave. The Colbert piece was in very good company that afternoon. Also included in the event were works by Chuck Close, Damien Hirst, Faile—a prominent fixture in the “street art” scene, whose spray paint works can be found on the streets of Williamsburg, and Mr Brainwash—the focus of the Banksy film “Exit Through the Gift Shop.”
People buzzed about de Pury's modern, open Park Avenue space while camera crews set up and latecomers frantically registered for the  2 p.m. auction at a desk near the entrance. Meanwhile, professionally smiley employees stood by looking helpful and cordial. While nodding to customers, client service representative Audrey Lindsey said that there was a “lot of good press, lot of people excited to see Colbert himself.”
“This is my second auction,” photographer Sarah H. said while the media in attendance prepped. “I like the de Pury stuff. This is a much more fun way to see art than in a store.” She added, “I’m excited, I watch the Colbert Report. We’ll see how good of an auctioneer he is.”
The pre-auction festivities included a video project that replayed the "Colbert" segment of the artists embellishing "Portrait 5." As the sale began, Colbert entered and the crowd cheered. When the auctioneer informed the audience that the buyer’s premium would be waived -- because the proceeds of the painting would go to charity -- Colbert briefly clapped. He was the only one to do so.

The bidding for his painting opened at $1. In what seemed like a matter of seconds, the bid rose to $6,000. "It's happening!" Colbert exclaimed. 

The fervent bidding went back and forth, reaching $17,000. At $18,000, Colbert put in a bid and jokingly pretended the man next to him had placed it. When the bidding stalled at $22,000, Colbert coughed, “higher.” At $24,000, Colbert ran up to the auctioneer’s podium and grabbed the microphone. The affable crowd applauded.

“If you’re not bidding, you hate children,” Colbert teased. “C’mon, have you seen the other stuff they have here today? Damien Hirst is doing spin art now.”

The satirical pundit talked non-stop through the bidding. “If you live in the New York area, I will personally hang the portrait," he begged the audience. "I will come to your mansion, yacht, or personal walk-in cocaine closet.”

Even more, he offered the highest bidder the chance to come on his show and receive the portrait. When the bidding leveled off at $26,000, Colbert made one final attempt to reach a higher bid. “Come on, it’s Mardi Gras, I’ll show you my tits!” he joked.

After throwing a last, longing gaze over the audience, Colbert banged the gavel. The crowd applauded. The de Pury auctioneer reclaimed the podium and declared the sale the “best piece of vertical integration—the artist promoted it and sold it. It’s completely innovative.” He then quipped, “we love to innovate at Phillips de Pury.”

After Colbert left, the murmurs of the audience wafted through the auction house. Some of the camera crews left too.
And then, the auctioned continued. The second lot (lot being the term auction houses use for the work being sold), a diptych by Elad Lassry of a Chilean flamingo and snowboarder Travis Parker, sold for $27,000. Lot 9, a painting of a text message that reads, “I’ve been blacked out for four days. U coming over tonite?” sold for $4,000.
By the time lot 11 was ready for auction, the atmosphere was much more focused and subdued than it was previously—with most of the bidding coming from the auction workers taking bids by phone. And for good reason too; lot 11, an oil painting by Dan Colen titled Untitled (Birdshit), sold for $74,000.

With lot 14, an ink and collage on wool canvas by Udomsak Krisanamis, the bidding shot up to $10,000, then $15,000 in 30 seconds. Lot 15, a painting by renowned artist Mark Grotjahn sold for $104,500. Shortly afterwards lot 17, a painting by Kehinde Wiley, which graces the cover of the “Under the Influence” catalogue, sold for upwards of $100,000.

At this point the seated audience became much larger. Everyone seemed prepared to dig in for the long haul. The catalogue had 287 lots in total. On why the catalogue was so substantial, Daniel, an employee for Phillips de Pury, said, “Some (of the lots) are cheaper. Whenever they have higher caliber works, there are less lots. Also, now we have two locations, so we can do more.”

In regard to Colbert’s presence at de Pury, he added, “It’s for a good cause, no reason not to be here. It’s theatre, just adds to it. Usually we don’t have celebs, even the artists promote. That never happens. I thought it was refreshing, I could see how more rich people didn’t care too much. They’re here to buy art, also (it’s) about schmoozing.”

Some did not share his opinion. Robert Blumenthal, who was there mainly for the two Ricci Albenda pieces, said, “It was pretty wild, pretty embarrassing—what, with offering to hang it! I didn’t know who he was actually.”